ADHD + Perfectionism

[00:00:00] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): When you're not letting yourself be yourself, that is when perfectionism takes a dark turn. That is when you become tightly wound.

[00:00:08] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): It's one thing to hold something firmly It's another thing to strangle a person. That's what you end up doing to yourself when you are fighting against The way that you are wired

[00:00:20] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): If you are ready to burn bright instead of burning out, to lead without losing yourself, and to enjoy the life you have worked so hard to create then keep listening.

[00:00:30] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): I'm your host, America's leader on rewiring perfectionism, CLG, and this is Perfectionism Rewired, the podcast. Welcome to Perfectionism Rewired

[00:00:43] Perfectionism is the new ADHD. Perfectionism is on the rise. 96 percent of the global human population is impacted by perfectionism?

[00:00:57] Yep, you can trust me. truth and accuracy in this episode by current neuro scientific journals and books referenced in the podcast show notes on perfectionismrewired. com.

[00:01:16] If you have ADHD, you think you might have ADHD.

[00:01:19] You identify with having ADHD. You love someone that has ADHD. You like someone that has ADHD. This episode, mind blowing.

[00:01:28] Perfectionism is the new ADHD. Perfectionism, like, ADHD. is not a deficit, it's not a crime, it doesn't mean that there's something wrong with you, and it's not all in your head.

[00:01:41] In a world that clings to the status quo and tries to push out anyone that sees the world uniquely, being unique is not always appreciated a lot of the time you are made to feel wrong.

[00:01:57] ADHD used to be considered short bus it was something that you really didn't want to disclose to other people. It was a hush hush thing.

[00:02:05] At least I felt that way as a woman with ADHD. I was diagnosed with it 22 years ago. And have lived through this revolution of now. ADHD is the smoke show at the senior prom that everybody wants to dance with.

[00:02:22] It seems like everyone wants to have ADHD people are talking about it so openly, which I think is so refreshing.

[00:02:28] So what do ADHD and perfectionism have in common? They're both personal identity markers, when you identify with it, it is a core part of your identity as a human.

[00:02:38] , your height is a personal identity marker. Like, your height, it's not changing. If you're a tall person yeah You can go around in life walking on your knees or like exclusively shopping in the petite's department or constantly hitting your head on way too low ceilings you could totally do that But you would make life really rough for yourself.

[00:02:57] Number two of what ADHD and perfectionism have in common, they are both part of neurodiversity. What does neurodiversity mean? It means that you are not average. Neurotypical or neuro normies as I like to call them.

[00:03:11] They're the people that you will get frustrated with sometimes because They'll just be like satisfied with status quo.

[00:03:19] You don't get it because like your brain just sees all of these opportunities or you see how this could have been different or you're like, how can you not care about this,

[00:03:28] , I'm like, you don't want to meticulously find and match the exact wood stain.

[00:03:33] What do you mean? yeah, there's a difference. It's not wood is just wood. No way, Jose.

[00:03:38] And then the third thing that they have in common is they are both things we have been gaslighted about try and be less of a perfectionist. Just like telling someone with ADHD. Can you try and be more boring?

[00:03:50] Can you try and be a little bit more dull? When it's like, uh, no, I am like a neon highlighter of a person. And for so long, maybe you are like me. I tried to be gray. Everybody gets along with gray and what happens

[00:04:06] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): when you're not letting yourself be yourself, that is when perfectionism takes a dark turn. That is when you become tightly wound.

[00:04:14] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): It's one thing to hold something firmly It's another thing to strangle a person. That's what you end up doing to yourself when you are fighting against The way that you are wired

[00:04:26] Your perfectionism isn't going anywhere you've tried fighting against it For decades.

[00:04:32] feel like you're living in a prison yard and that your perfectionism is poison that you are administering yourself and Criticizing yourself for the entire time.

[00:04:39] We know that that doesn't work. So hmm. You know what you have not tried you have not tried working with your perfectionism You have spent too long being a victim of perfectionism and vilifying it

[00:04:51] Why not work with it? How do you do that? You work with me! Inside of Perfectionism Optimized and my patented epic framework and methodology.

[00:05:04] it is where you become embodied, you become present, you become in tune with yourself and connected so that you are living a life full of intentionality and you are still an awesome, ambitious achiever but it doesn't come at the cost of what you care most about. And most importantly, you are enjoying yourself the entire time.

[00:05:26] Like, you get to feel proud of yourself at the end of the day, and you know how to feel proud of yourself. And no, it's not just looking in the mirror and telling yourself affirmations, aka lies that you don't even believe.

[00:05:36] Your perfectionism is a part of everything you do.

[00:05:39] Maybe you see it more in the executive realm, or maybe it comes up more in your personal relationships, or maybe it comes up more in your physiology, but perfectionism is equal opportunity. So if you have some areas that are impacted by that's just what you can see.

[00:05:58] Nobody knows you better than you do. And nobody knows perfectionism better than I do if you have been fighting against yourself, you've done very well for yourself.

[00:06:08] Just imagine how far and how fun it Your entire life will get when you rewire your perfectionism and you get the strongest Sumptuous support from me as your one on one coach if you are interested in that you can apply to work with me by going to CourtneyLoveGavin. com contact

[00:06:33] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): listen up. Taking charge of your perfectionism is so much easier than you have been led to believe. Whether you want to stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or be joyfully, present, ambitious again, you don't need more rigid rules. guesswork, or hard work in perfectionism recovery.

[00:06:53] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): You need a framework that helps you understand and most importantly rewire your perfectionistic habits from the inside out. It starts

[00:07:02] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): inside of Perfectionism Optimized,

[00:07:05] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): Besides the obvious mental health and wellness benefits, rewiring your perfectionism is the fastest way to figure out what's really underneath your perfectionistic patterns.

[00:07:16] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): This radically different, proven, proprietary approach helps you succeed by dropping the contempt and judgment that blocks change. Discover how to trust yourself, take control of your world, and feel truly empowered to own your perfectionism instead of being owned by it. Head on over to CourtneyLoveGavin.

[00:07:39] Courtney Love Gavin (CLG): com and start your transformation today.