Uncover how perfectionism impacts your intimate relationships and the No. 1 mistake you're probably making when it comes to resentment, Plus the ONE SKILL that makes you 90% less overwhelmed? It's like having the power to predict and avoid emotional meltdowns – for yourself!
Ready to rewire? Upgrade resentment for resilience inside Perfectionism Optimized, the only 1-1 private coaching exclusively made for for driven perfectionists + type-A high achievers with perfectionistic tendencies who want to quit fighting against themselves forever. Melt your stress away starting today over at: https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized
Referenced In the Episode:
- Carrying vs Caring In Relationships (Ep. 202) https://perfectionismrewired.com/episode/lighten-your-load-caring-deeply-without-taking-on-too-much
- How Perfectionistic Brains Work (Ep. 193) https://perfectionismrewired.com/episode/will-save-your-sanity-might-just-change-your-life
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
Perfectionism is very powerful. But only if you know how to leverage it. For more on optimizing your perfectionist tendencies go to perfectionist.solutions
[00:00:00] Hello! Before we start today's episode, if you would like a condensed version of what
[00:00:06] I'm talking about in this podcast, go ahead and subscribe to The Perfectionist's Guide.
[00:00:14] You can read the entire thing in three minutes or less. To access this, go to CourtneyLupGavin.com
[00:00:21] slash newsletter. Are you a bit of a perfectionist, type of resentment. So you no longer be resentful in your relationships. A client is getting married next month. When we started coaching together coaching, their relationship has blossomed with their partner and as a result, had a very positive impact on their family. And as a coach and clinician
[00:03:02] who specializes in working with perfectionists,
[00:03:04] it has been so joyful for tend to be resentful in relationships for. But the key here, when it comes to resentment, is there isn't anything wrong with resentment. Resentment is a sensation signal.
[00:04:21] It is a feeling flag.
[00:04:22] It is a, hey, there's something for you to look at here.
[00:04:26] The number one mistake high achievers, happen, well, who taught you how to deal with resentment? I'm guessing nobody. All the clients inside of Perfectionism Optimized, they're probably like, my coach taught me that. Which I do teach you, that is a tool that you will have in your toolbox forever, ever. With this episode, you have a choice point.
[00:05:42] Now that you have this awareness, you get to decide,
[00:05:45] do I want to continue rejecting resentment, the private podcast. So I have in addition to Perfectionism Rewired, I have the private podcast that is for clients inside of Perfectionism Optimized. It goes deeper into what you hear on the podcast with more how-tos, play sheets, guided hypnosis, all kinds of really cool things.
[00:07:00] But inside of that, I have an episode with secondary gains, like a question to ask yourself
[00:07:06] as you listen to this episode. I mean, though, is she would come to coaching and just be like, I'm so exhausted, I'm tired of feeling like I am a servant started not doing everything around the house. We actually started with locking the bathroom door, laying on the floor, taking two minutes to herself, turning the phone off, closing your eyes, and just being there. When you are facing a difficulty
[00:09:40] in your intimate relationship,
[00:09:42] whether it's I want to be more compassionate,
[00:09:45] I want to be less judgy,
[00:09:46] I want to be able to letting things go. And I did not believe this for the longest time
[00:11:02] because I always considered myself a very loving person.
[00:11:07] I did not podcast episode on that if you go to perfectionismrewired.com type in selfish, I bet there'll be something that comes up. If there isn't shoot me a note, and I'll release the episode because I know I recorded an episode on
[00:12:20] taking a selfish it just might not be out. I'm neuro diverse. I
[00:12:23] forget. I'm like, Oh, I know I recorded that. But did I release interoception. Interoception is your ability to notice what you're feeling. That's step one, notice. Step two is to identify what emotion you're feeling. Maybe you feeling resentful is you get clenchy, notice that your stomach starts to get hard and your jaw starts to tense up.
[00:13:43] That's how you experience resentment. When I'm telling you this, this is it.
[00:15:00] Maybe what you think doing. Oh, no. So, yes, it's the same thing with ourselves. All the tools that you have are effective all of the time
[00:16:21] because you actually have a repertoire to choose from.
[00:16:24] How to take action on this episode,
[00:16:26] notice the resentment, person or being the good girl or the best son. You could do that by embracing who the F you are and standing tall in your confident conviction, grounded and gatheredness in yourself. If you are interested in doing that, if this episode resonated with you, which guess what it did if you're still listening, then I
[00:17:42] invite you to go to CourtneyLoveGavin.com slash optimized today as someone who was